Storage Tips: Tender Little Berries

Berries are delicious. They’re also fragile, fickle, little pricks. Really the best advice I can give you on this one is to eat em up, quick like. Alternately, go ahead and freeze them or turn them into a righteous compote that you can pour over everything: pancakes, ice cream, styrofoam packing peanuts, etc…

But because we all like to try and deny the inevitable necrosis of all things, here’s how to make ‘em last their longest, Death Becomes Her Style.

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THE HUGE ETERNAL DEBATE ABOUT BERRIES: TWO SCHOOLS OF THOUGHT
There’s two prevailing schools of thought on this subject, as per my titular hyperbole and ten minutes of internet research.

SCHOOL OF THOUGHT ONE
The first school of thought says DO NOT WASH YOUR BERRIES UNTIL YOU ARE READY TO PUT THEM DIRECTLY INTO YOUR MOUTH.

But DO sort through them and get rid of any berries that are smooshed, moldy, or just look a little bit iffy. Prioritize consuming the ones that look the ripest first and place those at the top with the least ripe at the bottom.
Place them all in an air tight glass container with a paper towel along the bottom. The less you have to stack em within the container the better because it means less bruising.

SCHOOL OF THOUGHT TWO
The other school of thought recommends washing berries in a water and vinegar solution prior to storing them. They say this helps kill off the mold spores and bacteria that are already taking hold, thereby keeping them vital longer.If you want to continue my Death Becomes Her metaphor (as I do) then think of this like the amazing, death destroying serum Ms Rossellini is dispensing.  BUT BE WARNED: much like the movie’s heroinesyou still have to take good care of your berries if you do this. Dry them diligently with a towel, maybe even spin them gently in a salad spinner. Package them in an air tight container in your refrigerator, preferably with a lining of paper towels, as per above. 

Using one of these two methods, blueberries can last ya nearly 2 weeks. Strawberries the same. Raspberries probably 4-5 days. Crunch Berries will last past the next ice age.

ONE LAST THOUGHT:

I know those ceramic berry containers they sell at the bougie home goods stores are freaking adorable, but they are the OPPOSITE of what is going to make your berries last the longest. They’re the Banana Boat Tanning Oil ™ of berry storage, so as Andre 3K would say, “Don’t do it! Think it through! Reconsider!” 

THE END.

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